Blonde Q and A

 


Q: Why do blondes take the pill? A: So they know what day of the week it is. A redhead tells her blonde stepsister, "I slept with a Brazilian...." The blonde replies, "Oh my God! You slut! How many is a brazilian?" Q: Why do blondes wear their hair up? A: To catch everything that goes over their heads. Q: What does a blonde and a beer bottle have in common? A: They're both empty from the neck up. Q: Why was the blonde upset when she got her Driver's License? A: Because she got an "F" in sex. Q: What does a blonde do when her laptop computer freezes? A: She sticks it in the microwave! Q: Why did God give blondes 2 more brain cells than horses? A: So they don't shit in the parade. Q: What is it called when a blonde blows in another blonde's ear? A: Data transfer. Q: What's the mating call of the blonde? A: "I'm sooooo drunk!" Q: What do you call 10 blondes standing ear to ear? A: A wind tunnel. Q: Why are blondes bad at Hide and Seek? A: Because they can never find the sausage. Q: How do you get a blonde off of her knees? A: Cum. Q: What is a cool refreshing drink for a blonde? A: Perri-air. Q: How did the blonde try to kill the bird? A: She threw it off a cliff. Imitation of a blonde refuelling.. (Flap hand, blowing air into ears) Q: Why did the blonde stare at frozen orange juice can for 2 hours? A: Because it said 'concentrate'. Q: What do you call 10 blondes at the bottom of a pool? A: Air Pockets Q: What's five miles long and has an IQ of forty? A: A blonde parade. Q: Did you hear about the blonde who gave her cat a bath? A: She still hasn't gotten all the hair off her tongue. Q: Why do blondes wear ponytails? A: To hide the valve stem! Q: What goes: vroooom-schreech, vrooom-schreech, vroooom-schreech? A: A blonde at a flashing red light Q: How do you confuse a blonde? A: Ask her to alphabetize a bag of M&Ms. Q: What do you call a blonde holding a balloon? A: Siamese twins Q: What do you call an eternity? A: Four Blondes in four cars at a four way stop. Q: Why do Blondes have TGIF written on their shoes? A: Toes Go In First. Q: Why do Blondes always smile during lightning storms? A: They think their picture is being taken. Q: Why do blondes make bad bankrobbers? A: Because they tie up the safe and blow the guards Q: What happens when a blonde gets Alzheimers disease? A: Her IQ goes up! Q: How can you tell a blonde has used your computer? A: There is white out on the screen. Q: How do you change a blonde's mind? A1: Blow in her ear. A2: Buy her another beer. Q: What does a blonde say when you blow in their ear? A: "Thanks for the refill!" Q: How do you kill a Blonde? A: Put a Scratch 'n Sniff at the bottom of a pool. Q: Why did the blonde have square tits? A: Because she forgot to take the tissues out of the boxes. Q: What do you call a blonde with half a brain? A: Gifted! Q: What did the blonde do when she heard that 90% of accidents occur around the home? A: She moved. Q: Why don't blondes get coffee breaks? A: It takes too long to retrain them. Q: Why was the blondes' belly button sore? A: Because her boyfriend was blonde too. Q: Did you hear about the blonde who stayed up all night to see where the sun went? A: It finally dawned on her! Q: How does a blonde turn on the light after sex? A: Opens the car door. Q: Why do blondes wear hooped ear rings. A: So they have somewhere to put their feet when having sex. Q: What do you say to a blonde that won't come home with you? A: "Have another beer." Q: How do you drown a blonde? A: Tape a mirror to the bottom of a pool. Q: How do you kill a blonde? A: Give her a gun and say it's a hair drier. Q: Did you hear about the blonde who had two chances to get pregnant? A: She blew them both Q: Why did God invent orgasms? A: So blondes know when to stop screwing. Q: What's the difference between a blonde and a brick? A: If you lay a brick it doesn't follow you around for two weeks. Q: What happened to the blonde Ice Hockey Team? A: They drowned in Spring Training Q: Why were there 6 bullet holes in the blondes mirror? A: She tried to kill her self Q: How does a horny guy spell relief? A: B.L.O.N.D.E. Q: Why don't blondes talk when having sex? A: Their Mommies told them never to speak to strangers. Q: whats the differance between a blonde and a mosquito? A: When you slap the blonde she keeps on sucking. Q: What is the difference between blondes and traffic signs? A: Some traffic signs say stop Q: How can you tell if a blonde has a vibrator? A: By the chipped tooth. Q. Why are only 2% of blondes touch typists? A. The other 98% are huntin' peckers Q: How do you know if a Blonde has been using your computer? A: The joystick is still wet. Q: Why don't blondes call 911 in an emergency? A: They can't remember the number. Q: Why did the blonde tattoo her zip-code on her thigh? A: She wanted a lot of male in her box. Q: What can strike a blonde without her even knowing it? A: A thought. Q: What do you do when a blonde throws a pin at you? A: Run like hell, she has a grenade in her hand. Q: How did the blonde break her leg raking leaves? A: She fell out of the tree.